Pills - 3/21/12

Your heart is racing.
It's pounding out of your chest.
Your mind is moving as fast as your body.
There's no time to rest.
Arguing with the mentality that is still thinking right,
But your body is dependant.
Now putting up an unbeatable fight.
Showing obvious signs of how much it needs this drug.
You can't escape this no matter what you do,
Or what you think of.
Waking up with an overwhelming feeling of being ill.
You would do anything to refrain from taking this pill.
But you can't.
In a desperate moment,
You made the wrong call.
Now you're paying the price.
Flying in a free fall.
Knowing eventually you're gonna find the solid pavement.
And chances are by then,
There wont be much worth saving.
Doing anything possible to not think of this reality.
Diverting responsibilities.
Living almost cowardly.
Afraid of the raw truth of life.
Soaring in a realm that shouldn't exist.
Flying high as a kite.
Living in the clouds,
Comes with living with precipitation.
It's dark. It's cold. It's wet.
There are too many people occupying this population.
Naive to the fact,
That doing this to your body wont have a lasting effect.
Choosing to live in a world where it's only a "different" kind of pain.
In the end, It will all have been in vein.
Because at the end of the day,
When there's drugs,
There's too many shades of gray.
Clouding your mind and changing who you are.
Somewhere out there far,
Living in the blackness,
But still burning bright like a star.
The lifespan of a star is billions of years,
So surly they'll be waiting when you decide to face your fears.
Believe in yourself and know you deserve a better life.
You're a mother. Someday you'll be some body's wife.
Your children deserve to see who you truly are.
Not that person living far away in the blackness,
With fire burning stars.
They deserve more than unfulfilled dreams.
And not seeing you disabled.
With clipped or broken wings.
Trap all the beauty you can in your mind.
Create boundaries defined by thin lines.
Naturally getting close at times,
To walking on these lines,
But never allowing a foot to slip.
Be honest with yourself about any truth's you've hid.
In order to gain knowledge,
You occasionally have to trip and fall.
Mistakes make us wiser.
So don't let regret,
Eat you alive.
Pack your parachute.
Hold your breath and dive.
Those black holes will fill on there own.
Once you let the darkness go.

* I personally have never had a struggle with this but know many people who have.