Gravel Roads 4/13/12

I write about anything and all things going on in my life.
Memories. Every battle Ive ever had to fight.
It's written in ink. In pen somewhere.
Filling notebooks of blank pages with my emotions.
My thoughts are scribbled everywhere.
By the time they are written for other eyes to see.
They are put in a format so that you can understand them perfectly.
Filling your eyes and hearts full of tears.
Because you had no idea who I really was all these years.
Only known as Ben and Jody Fears little sister.
I didn't have name until I was almost 21.
Being alone for so long has made me so strong.
I absolutely love what Ive become.
I love that I found the courage,
To share these words I right with people struggling.
Battling their own fights.
To comfort lonely hearts. Or lost souls walking blindly in the dark.
To share pieces or myself with strangers.
Giving you every one a piece to discard. Or hold onto forever.
I hope that when you read these words It's like someone giving you a needed hug.
That it puts your fears at ease.
Or makes you be what you were always meant to be.
I hope that they make you feel like a soaring Robin.
Completely uplifted and free.
Sometimes they are painful enough to bring you to your knees.
Your heart is pulsating like it was just shot with a pity gun.
But that's not why they are there.
They are to remind you to enjoy the good. Along with the bad.
To not worry about the color of your hair.
That what is inside will shine brighter then any bleach.
Lessons Ive learned the hard way.
I almost feel an obligation to share. To teach.
People don't go through what I have for no reason.
Maybe I have finally found my reason.
So that I can write about things that truly matter. Instead of gossiping.
I believe there is so much more to life then living it through a television.
Nature does something for me that no one can.
When Ive been alone and with no one comforting holding my hand.
Nature speakes to me. Showing me nothing but beauty.
Even while driving down the road and seeing wasteful peoples trash.
It doesn't take anything away. It doesn't distract me.
Or take my eyes away from such a beautiful thing.
Trees that make it easier for us to breath.
Giving us oxygen. Rivers so fresh and so clean.
You immediately want to dive right in.
If it wasn't for the shock of the cold you might feel compelled to do so.
Maybe we all need that shock.
The orange, Pinks, and purples when the sun is ready for bed.
When it starts to set and get real low as your getting ready to rest your head.
Or the song birds chirpping at the crack of dawn.
Before your even awake with time to stretch and yawn.
The freshness of a morning is unlike anything.
The beautiful fall before the gorgeous spring.
The summers and everything they bring.
People you love to spend them with.
BBQing, Laughing, Camping, Rafting.
Have you ever got really close to grass when its wet.
Little tiny perfect drops of water that sparkle in sunlight.
These are some of the reasons God blessed us with eyes. With sight.
Life, Even at it's hardest should never be taken for granted.
You should take every lesson. And plant them.
Never allow yourself to forget or you'll be taking the test again.
Like the starry night of Vincent Van Gogh.
Use your talents. Get them out. Put them on display for show.
Inspire those who have lost inspiration.
You never stop learning. Life is meant to be educational.
Do what you love often. Not just recreational.
Never tell yourself "I'll do it tomorrow".
Because you might not have that time. Time is barrowed.
When your paths become rocky. No longer solid pavement.
They have narrowed. Now they are just gravel filled with pot holes.
Don't ever stop walking.
Believe and have faith that for whatever the reason.
This, Is the path that you have to trust you are meant to follow.