You prance around with your un-shattered ego.
Refusing to let me go.
Still, bringing other girls home.
To sleep in your bed.
The same bed, I rest my head.
Finding different color hair strands in my hands.
Wrapped around my fingertips.
My heart feels like its base jumping in those moments.
My mind is free falling.
Without a parachute.
My rationality is spinning through hoops.
My voice disappears.
Like I was Ariel.
Who gave it to Ursala for my Eric.
My unconditional love is sinking like the Titanic.
So violent.
And sad.
Like with any grieving process,
I become mad.
Irate is more like it.
Out of control.
With a will to do so.
On a rampage of anger.
Everyone becomes a stranger.
Feeling unaware of what they are capable of.
Like a stray cat.
Unlike a free white dove.
Trapped and afraid.
When moments earlier,
I was feeling elated.
This roller coaster that we all know too well,
Is driving me straight to hell.
Allowing another human soul,
To steal my own.
To damage my being.
Leaving me with nothing but these awful feelings.
I never wish to go back.
But again,
I end up trapped.
Falling in love,
Is exactly what they call it.
Falling.
I never question in advance,
Where or when I am going to land.
Just like an innocent child on a ride at Disneyland.
Its so liberating,
That before its even over,
I have a desire to experience it all over again.
Even when I'm hesitant.
Or scared.
I feel compelled.
To pull up pieces from my own soul.
Before its stolen.
On my race to get it back,
Is when I learn the most.
I cant hate those who hurt me,
Because little does anyone know,
Including I,
How much I needed to feel like I was going to die.
How much I needed to be torn apart inside.
Sometimes we need to cry.
There is also no excuse for intentionally hurting another.
Every man,
Should look at every women,
As if it was his mother.
And before you go making that perverted,
Isn't that the problem already?
We are not created for your sexual satisfaction.
And while I'm at it;
I wonder if a man has ever looked at pornography,
Questioning the human being?
Taking away their own need for release in that moment,
And seeing a stranger,
As somebody's daughter.
Not to mention,
There seems to be little attention,
Brought to these life altering events.
Its what makes these behaviors, glorifying.
When the reality is horrifying.
Do you honestly believe those men and women are just simply nymphos?
Who enjoy sex more than the average?
Or do you ever stop to wonder what could have happened to them when they were children?
Why someone would even allow such degrading things when being an educated adult?
Half the time,
They likely don't even remember it happening.
But it created this animal,
Within a human.
With an overly active response to sexual behavior.
Little do we even know,
How we could be one of them also.
There are layers upon layers to everything that has a surface.
Never become complacent.
Nobody realizes how much we contribute to such horrible things.
Like sex abuse and sex trafficking.
Child pornography.
We all know it exists.
But nobody seems to be desperately trying to put a stop to it.
Its our neighbors.
Friends.
Uncles.
Brothers.
Husbands.
Fathers.
Grandfathers.
And we refuse to acknowledge it.
Acknowledge the sick.
I've read about how businessmen travel to Thailand.
Because its the most easiest place to take advantage of children.
I'm tired of men getting away with it.
Its not ok.
Women need to scream with their voices.
Pay attention.
To deceitfulness and manipulation.
Because some men,
Literally just cant help it.
They have a problem.
Taught since they were children,
That its ok to mistreat women.
In fact,
We use to take offense,
When a boy didn't sexually prefer a girl.
Abusing him verbally for not being able to bend his free will.
His preference.
The more manly you are,
The more respected you're given.
So it makes sense,
Why some men don't give a shit about women.
We only draw the line when it becomes physical.
Its not right at all.
I'm blond.
With a chest.
That was only created to feed my children.
I'm tired of standing on this stage.
Who put me here in the first place?
Just because I'm attractive,
Doesn't mean I want or need the attention.
Just because I have self worth,
Doesn't mean I'm a stuck up bitch,
Or that I'm narcissistic.
I'm sure there are many women who are as fed up as I.
The expectations are getting ridiculous.
I would like to go back to spending my time with children.
Sustaining a future.
Not spending it taking care of men.
Men who have no respect.
Men who have little appreciation for women.
We are the only reason your last name is carried.
These incredible bodies that were meant to create life,
Are now only sexualized.
Enough is enough.
We're exhausted.
And please,
Don't lecture me on the 1%.
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